Tuesday, September 21, 2010

my dad,en omar~

wanna tell dis story long time ago,but never have the time to write it.its all about him,our family's hero.... even though i'm not that close enough to him,but i'll treasure him as someone who had made me the way i am rite now.yup,en omar ab razak aka my dad~really hard to find his picture alone,because he's never like taking pictures~even on hari raya!!

ayah used to be someone we'd really scared of.he has the character that made us listen to every words he said.becos he's busy working to provide our needs,we have little time to sit and chat together.everything will be direct to mama,even when we dont have money!!!so basically mama would be our representator to seek funds from ayah=p

so,when ayah had retired,he spends most of the time at home.but,during his retirement,everyone had gone to university and hostels.the only person who got to know ayah better is only mama,and his grandchldren.ayah starts to talk more,gardening,becomes more soft-heartening towards chldren( ok, i'm comparing between us long time ago and today,when he's playing with his grandchild). but he's not strong like before~he's becoming more reliable to us....

when he's 40,doctor told him he's got heart disease and high blood pressure. he's performing hajj that year cos afraid he's not gonna make it later. alhamdulillah,he's still strong until now.but afte bypass operation last year i think,he's becoming a little bit slow in action.he once said:
"nabi muhammad ada kata,limit umur umat dia cma 60 tahun.klu pjg umur,lbh dr tu,maka tuhan akan tarik nkmat satu-persatu.mmg terasa sgtla bla umur da mningkatni...."

even if he wants to take off his shirt,it will take longer than usual.he cant drive for long journeys,becos his legs will become numb. there's 1 day at kmpung where we all go to kebun, and then suddenly my father, riding motorcycle fell off from his bike becos of the stone at the road blocking him.i do think that if he has kudrat,he can stop himself from falling but mybe becos of his age,he falls off very slowly.thank God were behind him.the place is really far away from our home!!

but nevertheless,i love him more and more everyday.eventhough i've never show it to him,i'll do pray for him each time,hope for him to have a blessful life today and hereafter. hoping that he will be there during my wedding...hoping that he will be there when i have my first baby....hoping that Allah will give happiness to us in this world and Hereafter. "kematian adalah sesuatu yg pasti,maka hendaklah kita sentiasa bersedia insyaAllah".

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

thanx for the memories

need to calm down,eventhough don know where should i start.jus coming back from that place,and sudddenly everythings come at one time.raya preparation,knvo,and most importantly~job hunting!!hurm,back to lazy mode,and preparing mentally to be lecture by my sblings

'pgla cri keja'
'da try mntak kt sykat x?'
'resume tu da btulkn blm?'
'ari2 ada call sykt x tak mntak update'

but the most hatred thing to say

'menyemak je kt umahni,pgla cri keja=p'

who doesnt want to have a job?especially 4 fresh grad like me~but i dont want to change job regularly,jus becos i'll take this thing lightly.need to work harder,in order to make the big boss employ me.fgting!!!!
so,what have i done in this past 2 and half month?i cant say that i learn nothing at all,but most probably,erk....0.5% mybe.only frenship that i treasure.met lots of people and have a great time with them.were all in the same boat,and have the same unhappiness. and i have been given great responsibility to deal with.being a leader is not always an 'easy' task.its not like i don have courage to take the challenge,but the thing is it came too suddenly,without notice. even i myself cannot accept the prgram,how on earth may i lead and help the facilitator to ensure the smoothness of the program.and the way they guide us,erk....no thanx~rather learning by myself than asking them. we ourselves who had dgree or diploma never even mntion about our crtificates or feeling big enough to empower them but deep inside themselves they think that we are trying to show off with what we had.hurm,mybe only some of them,but it makes me sick!!

basically, want to show my deepest thanx to my best frens there~SYUD,ANEM and adik manis FAZ.they've been going through lots with me.they saw me laughing,crying etc~wthout them i don know what will happen...

syud~she's strong,mybe due to the age and experience she once had. most probably our thnking were same,and i have lots of fun doing crazy things with her.she has the confidence that rarely people our age have.luv everything about her...praying for brighter future for us.

anem~she's a good companion~always listening to my complain,complain and complain,but never complain about me.a good leader,eventhough at first she's unsure with her talent. love her jokes very much,blh wat org guling2~needs to says sory to her if i had done anything bad to her becos u know,always besides her this past 2 and half month.

faz~she's good,and she's totally pure....~very energetic smtimes but when the night comes, she's usually exhausted.a little bit moody,jus like a small child.but its totally understandable becos she's the younger.learn a lot from her,and she's really adorable from every perspective.luv to make people smile but sadfully she's a regular in medic=)take care of your health ye cik adik~

in the end,i jus wanna let them know that eventhough it seems like i less care about them becos of the way i respond to them~i'm truly appreciate them as my frens.they help me a lot and i dont know how to thanx them enough.to all of my buddies that i have get to know there,thanx for all the memories and i do hope we keep in touch in the future.....